"Everything was so much easier when we didn't have a care in the world. Our only problems would be if there was enough cheese in the fridge to make nachos for lunch, or if we used it all up the day before."

Things are already starting to change, starting that transition from summer freedom back to educational solitude. I know this for the fact that I'm getting those phone calls, and those messages, from everyone in an attempt to hang out or get together. Guess I should start putting in a little bit of effort.

I went over to Brie's house last night, after we hung out the entire day, and spent the night there. I figured I haven't seen her basically all summer, and wanted to spend some time with her. It wasn't as though it was awkward or anything, but there was just something off. It wasn't how it always used to be; there was some type of unspoken question of thought on both of our minds. We ended up getting into one of those in depth conversations that last for hours, and you don't even realize that the time has passed so quickly. I found out a lot of things. Things that completely surprised me, and others that didn't in the slightest bit. But in the end every single one made me feel worse and worse about myself.

I keep feeling like I've put myself into this hole. I constantly feel terrible about myself, and keep running myself down. I've cried more now, than I have in my entire life. I don't know where it suddenly came from. I was fine. Or at least I thought I was.

Could I change one thing?
Could I change your mind?
Shall we burn it just like the last time?
I can't change a thing, can't explain why I never felt it
Not even the first time.

Ciao.